7 Things I Was Reminded Of In 2019

Today is the first day of 2020.

I’m sitting here thinking about the entire past year. So much happened everywhere it seems. I’ve heard several news broadcasters say things are happening so fast that it’s hard to keep up to date on news stories. I certainly seems like that.

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Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

2019 had its ups and downs; a challenging year. I had new territories to conquer.  Maybe it wasn’t as hard as it felt, but either way I was reminded of a few things along the way.

  1. Listen carefully when loved ones speak.

You know how the more familiar you are with something, the less you need to focus on it. I mean, the things you do, see, interact with on a regular basis require less attention to maintain. If you can walk, how much attention do you give to where exactly you place your feet and how your toes feel when they touch the ground? You just walk. If you are a typist, how much time do you spend analyzing each letter on the keyboard? You just know where they are, so your fingers just follow the words in your mind and fly across the keys.

I thought about this with my loved ones. It is so easy to become totally emotionally deaf when the people you are closest to attempt to tell you how they feel about something. Why? Because you assume you know them, you already know what they like, who they are, etc. I’ve learned that with the ones closest I must read between their words and emotional expressions. I must listen to not only their words, but also pay attention to the emotions behind the words. Sometimes words alone don’t tell the whole story. I learned this the hard way, early this year. I almost sabotaged a friendship by totally missing some cues. This friend tried to express her feelings in the best way she could…but I was clueless. Good news, we are still friends, but I admit I worked hard to restore it to some degree of normalcy because it was a friendship worth fighting for. I can easily see though how so many friendships end in despondency.

LESSON REMINDED: Not everyone is able to express themselves in a way that is palatable for me. If the relationship is worth keeping, I must step outside my comfort zone, or press a situation to barrel down to the core so the friendship can be salvaged and rebuilt.
  

  1. Loneliness is part of life, embrace it as much as you can.
person in black hoodie sitting on train bench
Photo by Steven Arenas on Pexels.com

Aloneness is a wonderful thing. Everyone should take moments out of life to be alone, sit, reflect, pray, regroup, or whatever. It is vital to understand yourself as much as you can first. That gap between who people perceive you to be and who your really are can trip you up. I’m not talking about that here. I’m talking about loneliness. I would guess, loneliness is a major factor in much of the depression and even despair seen in our culture.

People need people. You know now dogs are pack creatures, well, I think people are like that as well. You may not need to have someone else in your face day in and day out but at some point, you need the physical and emotional touch of others. Sadly, this is becoming more difficult to achieve in our society it seems. In our ‘selfie’ world, reaching out beyond oneself usually entails a backward facing camera on the end of a stick.

I spend a lot of time alone. It doesn’t bother me most of the time but there are times when I need to find my friends, I need the comfort of hugs from people who love me, and I need to know that they are accessible.

This year I thought about loneliness a lot. I was thinking about the people I know and was taken back by the number of them who are single people living alone. It made me sad. Not that these people are sad about their situations, it just made me sad that in our culture, this is becoming more of a norm. We promote an independent nature in our culture, but it looks like it has consequences.

 LESSON REMINDED: It only takes a couple seconds to send a text or email to someone to let them know you are thinking of them, and that you don’t want anything from them. You just wanted them to know they were on your mind. It is amazing how much this small act can redirect and brighten a person’s day. I have a very special sister friend, who calls me regularly. Most times its only to say, …”I didn’t want anything, just wanted to hear your voice.”. I hope you have people in your life like that. If not, message me.
  

  1. You see your parents aging but their Golden Years still sneaks up on you.

If you are a middle-aged person and are blessed to still have parents who are alive, then they are probably in their 70s, 80s or even 90s. As a kid, you enjoy your parents as young people; vibrant, working, living life. Then one day, you look up at you see two people

photo of elderly man walking on pavement
Photo by Immortal shots on Pexels.com

who step more gingerly, move more slowly, and think less clearly; they’ve become ‘old’. But wait! This can’t be MY parents, they are …. Yes, they have reached that season in life.

I saw it coming to. I was still not prepared. But a string of physical ailments, calendars filled with doctor’s appointment, Medicare literature filling their mailbox, knee pains, technology battles, and hospital stays reality set in and I realized they were elderly. I was literally slowly taking over things and becoming the person in charge. I never had children, so I was not used to being in charge of any one but myself. WAKE UP CALL!

LESSON REMINDED: As overwhelming and tiring as it can be sometimes, I don’t mind it at all. I told my parents I will do all I can for them as they age. They did all they knew to do for me as their child. It’s an honor for me, plus I know it pleases God and they are his children too.
  

  1. Old age is scary.

I have always had an affinity for senior citizens. I like to listen to their stories about the times in which they grew up, their perspective and wisdom in situation, their knowledge from experience, all of it. There is so much to be learned. Unfortunately, we all know that older folks are not revered as they should be in our society.

I’ve gotten to spend a lot of time with some terrific older people. Some were young when I met them and over the years, I’ve watched them age and others I met after they were well into their senior-hood.

In conversations with them I learned of some of their fears. One told me he doesn’t like to go out much anymore because he cannot defend himself anymore. Another told me he worries about being alone after years of living with a spouse. And, another said she fears losing her mind – dementia.

When you are young, you don’t think of these things much at all. You just go about your day doing your thing with no fear of not being about to fight, or run away, or not being able to remember common things. As I listened, yeah, old age seems scary.

I’ve had several opportunities to visit senior homes this year. I like to think that some of these older folks feel much better in a community of people in which they can interact. I don’t know; maybe it’s less scary to be scared with someone else.

LESSON REMINDED: Go visit a senior citizen as often as you can. If the senior citizen is a family or friend go twice as often as you can. Your presence is worth worth more than anything else you could bring.
 

  1. The moment of death is easy, but the process will certainly kill you.

Somehow, growing up, I escaped having to attend many funerals. I only remember going to one when I was about 10 for a Great-Aunt, then another Great-Aunt when I was in my 20’s. Then over the next few years I would hear of deaths of more distant family and people who were not that close to me in my life but didn’t attend most of the funerals.

But then, starting around early 2016,well into my adulthood, it seemed every few weeks, I’d hear of people who were nearer to my heart getting sick and passing away. I mean, numbers nearing 20! It sort of knocked me for a loop. I have attended more funerals in the past 2 years the I have in all my life. The last being just a couple weeks ago.

flowers marguerites destroyed dead

I’ve thought about death a lot lately. Not to be morbid, I’ve had friends die in numerous ways these past 3 years. It’s hard to both watch the process of dying and hard to suffer the sudden loss of a quick unexpected death.

It seems the moment between the last breath in this life and the first breath of the next life is the actual death. Short and easy. But I’ve witnessed how getting to that last breath can be long, painful, sad, stressful, scary, and everything else you can imagine.

LESSON REMINDED: I can only think of this poem when I recall the friends and family who have passed away.

 Only One Life
By C.T. Studd

Two little lines I heard one day,
Traveling along life’s busy way;
Bringing conviction to my heart,
And from my mind would not depart;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last. 

Only one life, yes only one,
Soon will its fleeting hours be done;
Then, in ‘that day’ my Lord to meet,
And stand before His Judgement seat;
Only one life,’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

 Only one life, the still small voice,
Gently pleads for a better choice
Bidding me selfish aims to leave,
And to God’s holy will to cleave;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

 Only one life, a few brief years,
Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears;
Each with its clays I must fulfill,
living for self or in His will;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last. 

When this bright world would tempt me sore,
When Satan would a victory score;
When self would seek to have its way,
Then help me Lord with joy to say;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

 Give me Father, a purpose deep,
In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e’er the strife,
Pleasing Thee in my daily life;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

 Oh let my love with fervor burn,
And from the world now let me turn;
Living for Thee, and Thee alone,
Bringing Thee pleasure on Thy throne;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

 Only one life, yes only one,
Now let me say,”Thy will be done”;
And when at last I’ll hear the call,
I know I’ll say “twas worth it all”;
Only one life,’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last. 

 

  1. It’s OK to let some friends drift away.

Remember when you were a kid and the most important thing in life was who your friends were … or weren’t. Those gatherings on the playgrounds could make or break your social status in the entire playground (and lunchroom) hierarchy.

a man rowing a small boat with a sail
Photo by Md Towhidul Islam on Pexels.com

I used to tell myself one of the best things about being an adult is that you don’t have to be friends with everyone. I thoroughly enjoy choosing friends. Fortunately, I make friends easily, but unfortunately, I had to learn that many of the people I meet and befriend are not meant to be in my life always; or not even for a long time. I have friends from when I was a teen-ager and I have friends I just met last month. These friendships are all at different stages and have different roles in my life.

Recently, I thought of a friend I had years ago; we had the best times together. I thought of looking her up on Facebook to see if she was still around the area. Then I stopped myself. At the time we hung out we were at the same place in life. Now, some years later, I’m sure our lives are different, and lots has changed. I decided to leave this on to God who is the best orchestrator and path-crosser if it’s meant to be. Letting a friendship go is not always a bad thing, sometimes, it’s a growing thing.

Friendships are worth the investment. You just have to determine which ones are worth your time and effort. I have friendships now that exist only because I keep them going. I’m OK with that because it helps me rank the friendship. Remember, I said, some different friends have different roles. Don’t get your feelings hurt when your ‘friend’ doesn’t invest the same time you put in. Take this as information for use in keeping your own world in perspective. Plus, just face it, you are probably on the fringes of a lot of your friend’s radar, and that’s OK.  Life is busy and hard and unless you are a key person, you are probably more likely not a friend, but ‘someone they know’. You’ve got all the Facebook ‘friends’ that you don’t even know! Not to sound cynical but I’ve learned the hard way…friendship is relative.

LESSON REMINDED: Sometimes it’s best to NOT rekindle old, dried-up forgotten friendships. Just remember the purpose they had at the time and enjoyment of the friendship, keep the good memories in your heart, then let it be. I say this because people and times change. When you were friends in the past it was time for that friendship, if it fizzled, then its time was up. If it’s meant to be, they will find you on Facebook. 😉
  

  1. Find things to look forward to.  

I’m one of these people who kind of thrives on change. I get bored easily, so I need things to change in my life on occasion. It doesn’t have to be anything major like moving, or a new job or anything like in the past but now as I get older, I like to just try new things. I’ve discovered some great things about myself in my quest for change. Five years ago, I discovered I have a knack for drawing portraits (www.facebook.com/portraitartbyjan). I always liked art but lacked skill. I guess it needed all my life to percolate. Haha. I still want to learn a new instrument, try ballroom dancing, and taking a cross country road trip.

white car traveling near trees during daytime

Change is good. It is needed. You learn the most about yourself when you are put in a position to change, you learn even more about yourself when you are forced to change. Frederick Douglas has a great a quote …

Inaction is followed by stagnation. Stagnation is followed by pestilence and
pestilence is followed by death.”

I’ve decided that I want to purchase a small RV and travel. With a remote job, this is quite possible. I have spent a year studying YouTube videos on van-types, solar panels, types of toilets, camping options, etc. It has been so much fun learning about it all. The other day I thought, … ‘this may never happen, but I am having a blast learning about it.’ More importantly, it gives me something to look forward to in life. We all need something to look forward to in life. That something if often tied to your purpose.

LESSON REMINDED: The opposite of moving forward and changing is not moving backwards, but stagnating. Life is in movement and growth, not always in body, but in mind, heart, and spirit.

 

May you have a blessed, prosperous, ever growing year of
peace, love, and joy in Jesus!

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Photo by Anna-Louise on Pexels.com

Much Love to you, Jan!

🎆💛🎆💛🎆

Playing with Broccoli Cuts

 

I’m sitting here wondering if there is a real reason for broccoli cuts.?🤔

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Photo by slon_dot_pics on Pexels.com

I mean, Broccoli florets make sense; they are pretty, flavorful, and healthy,  but ‘cuts’ are basically the stems – cut up, right?

AD586F1A-E222-4C9D-9D0A-53DB9F04E125The picture looked all luscious and delicious but the bag of frozen cuts I bought did have one or two small florets…whatever, I really did expect what I got, not what was on the bag.

I added a bit more chicken broth and let the cuts get softer than how I usually eat my veggies but I had a plan. Then I got out my Ninja blender. I added the thoroughly cooked cuts, added a bit of half and half (all I had), added more broth, salt, pepper, ginger, turmeric and hit the ON button.

It whirred around until, it was light green, smooth, a bit creamy and ohhhhh so tasty.

VOILA! Turned those worthless cuts into a delicious gourmet soup.

I had some for dinner tonight. It’s a cold, dark, long winter night and this concoction hit the spot. I think I might try this with fresh broccoli stalks next summer.

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Might not look so tasty but this was quite delicious!

So, not only can you turn lemons to lemonade but you can also turn blah broccoli cuts into deliciousness.

Go make you some soup! 😎👍🏽

Finally Cold Weather

I live where it is HOT…. very HOT most of the year it seems. 😒. I like colder weather personally so I wait patiently each year for long, hot, throat-crunching humid days to END.  Finally! Today was cold, misty, and grey skies all day long… wonderful! 🤗

after being out in it all day I craved a warm cozy meal.  Putting aside all concerns about calories for a bit. I found a can of Tomato and Carrot soup that a friend gave me. Interesting. Then I mad something I rarely to never make… a Grilled Cheese sandwich.  It goes with Tomato soup, right?

I’ve never been food at making them but somewhere along the way I heard about spreading  mayo on the outside of the bread…. making it nice and grilled. Was worth a try since mine always ended up burnt on the outside with unmelted cheese on the inside. 😒

It worked… better than usual anyway. 😊. Had my cozw cold night meal … delicious!0D97F8F4-347A-4F30-BE06-09A824237BCF

Next time I will discuss this 10 lbs I’ve gained….uuugh!

Peace and Love friends!🤗😘

 

Total Solar Eclipse: August 21, 2017

Eclipse 2017

😳😳 NEVER LOOK AT THE PARTIAL PHASES OF OR TOTAL ECLIPSE WITHOUT PROPER EYE PROTECTION! 😳😳

I went to Fernbank Science Center this week and learned some interesting facts about the coming eclipse. Yes, I could have learned the same information by Googling it but that wouldn’t have been nearly as much fun and interactive as sitting in a planetarium with friends and youngsters having a live Georgia Tech astronomy student narrate the whole thing.

Here are some of the things I learned, in addition to…

😳😳 NEVER LOOK AT THE PARTIAL PHASES OF OR TOTAL ECLIPSE WITHOUT PROPER EYE PROTECTION! 😳😳 ….. did I say this already??🤔

• On August 21 a total solar eclipse event will happen in North America stretching from the west coast in Salem, Oregon ending in South Carolina.


• The last time an eclipse crossed from west to east was 99 years ago! …and get this… the last time a total eclipse was seen only in the United States was in 1776!!!


• The last one in the USA was 38 years ago.


• Ten (10) states will be in the path of totality … meaning folks in the 65 mile wide path of totality will get to see the eclipse in its fullness.


• The whole event only lasts a couple of minutes or so … or less. Millions of people are within an hours drive from having a great view of it.

… for other interesting facts, Google is your friend. 👍🏽 (lots of info is on the Internet)

One last thing…. Seriously, did I say this already?

😳😳 NEVER LOOK AT THE PARTIAL PHASES OF OR TOTAL ECLIPSE WITHOUT PROPER EYE PROTECTION! 😳😳 ….. did I say this already??🤔

… in other words…

If you look at this eclipse without proper eye protection (glasses made specifically for viewing an eclipse), then this eclipse could be the very last thing you will ever see clearly in your natural life… a.k.a blindness.

P.S. I will probably watch it on television. 😏

I Tried These 2 New Foods

I’m not the most adventuresome when it comes to trying new foods.  Chances are, if it is slimy, looks like it will attack me as I eat it, or comes out of the ocean (except salmon and sometimes shrimp), I won’t mess with it.

Recently, I tried two new foods though… quinoa and riced veggies (cauliflower). Hmmm… interesting things I discovered about both.

First, the quinoa.  Was walking through Publix and saw this on sale and bought it. Read lots of good things about quinoa, good source of protein, and that it’s a SEED, not a GRAIN, therefore no gluten issues.   Who knew? (I didn’t apparently).

 

File May 29, 11 58 20 AM

It looked fairly interesting in the bag, and I thought it would be a good way to ‘feel’ like I was eating pasta, but wasn’t so, I cooked it (just like rice) and surprisingly it was very delicious. The tri-color made it interesting  too.  I believe it comes in black, white and red, or so,etching like that.

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So, I don’t know if it was because I was in such a hurry to try this on the first day or what but the second day I opened the container and saw this😳:

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…are these WORMS??? … I won’t lie, I did have a ‘moment’  🤢

I started Googling like a mad women and discovered that the little wormy-looking things were actually sprouts… it’s a seed, so the cooking process causes the quinoa to germinate! OOOOHHHHHH! I get it now!   Found that to be quite interesting … so I continued to eat it and wasn’t grossed out at all…because it’s like sprouts … I can do that.

The next new thing I tried was Riced Veggies (cauliflower). I’d seen this online too but no way was I going to do all I saw in the video because cauliflower is not one of my favorite vegetables so I figured it didn’t deserve the labor involved in ricing it.  However, while at Kroger I saw this and thought! “Here’s my chance!”

File May 29, 11 52 34 AMIf I liked it, it could be a good substitute for real rice, which I loooove (and rarely eat). So, it went home with me.  It was interesting for sure; looked like rice kind of too.  I cooked it easily enough and added my usual spices ( garlic, salt, pepper, cumin, etc.)  and it was surprisingly very good.

File May 29, 11 51 32 AMNow, I won’t say it ‘tasted’ like rice, however, there is something about the texture and look of it that satisfies (or maybe tricks) your brain to ‘think’ rice …. but only for 20 calories per cup.  I think I can do that too.  😎   There was a recipe on the back for Stir Fry Riced Vegetable.  Yum…I bet if you add some chicken to it, 😋.  I’ll let you know if I try it.

So, there you have it! I recommend both of these.  They’re definitely being added to my list of ‘regular’ foods I like.

Weigh In – Way Out!

For a two-year period in recent years, I decided I would stop weighing myself and let my ‘good sense’ and visual analysis (a.k.a mirror check) dictate if I was climbing up the scales or not. Bad idea.  Some 40 pounds later I was physically getting in my own way as I tried to turn over in bed. How does that happen?

A body scale has been my worst enemy at times in my life.  They say that the ‘numbers’ don’t matter but in my world, the numbers were everything.  From childhood, I was always considered obese to morbidly obese according to those little height-weight medical charts. To this day I still don’t agree with that chart. One of my favorite reads was “10 Reasons Why the BMI is Bogus!”. Who knows how true it is, but it made so much sense to me.

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Anyway,  I’ve had an awful history with the scales.  In the past, it has literally dictated whether I had a ‘good’ day or a ‘bad’ day, all based on whether I was up a few or down a few pounds…. overnight.  Craziness!.  I remember waking up  on some days feeling all happy and ready for my day, I’d jump on the scales and if the number wasn’t right, it was like a switch flipped in my brain and I was instantly self-hating and miserable the rest of the day. Don’t judge, I know I’m not the only one who has done this.

It took years to understand the ‘psychology’ behind the emotions that were tied to the scales.  I had no understanding of being healthy in those days, I just wanted to be ‘thin’.  It seemed good things happened if you were thin… and could wear cute clothes.  What was I thinking…skinny isn’t even in my DNA so it was like I was fighting an invisible beast… and losing.

As I approached 50 years old, I decided that being healthy was the most important thing to me. Like I said in previous posts, I didn’t want to get any of the medical maladies that most times come from bad eating habits and lifestyle (and if I did get any it wouldn’t be because of my own bad choices).  I think I had decided by 50 that being overweight, fat, fluffy, whatever you want to call it, was just how it was going to be for me…. but…. I could choose to eat healthy, move more and at least make the effort.  So,  on July 6, 2016, I did just that, and soon I started to drop pounds.

I still weigh daily, and doing so has taught me a LOT!  At first, I saw the numbers going down pretty steadily every day.  It was invigorating to me!  I have a digital scales that weighs to the 10th pound so even 2/10 of a pound felt major. Using MyFitnessPal app, I could see the little graph moving down daily. Happy, happy, happy. Weighing daily made a nice little chart.

But then after a month or so, I noticed the some ‘up’ days happening.  Initially had an old reaction like… “WHATTT?!?  … this can’t be!“…. I had to tell myself, “Girl, just ‘keep doing what you are doing? Your goal is to be healthy, not skinny.”  That was hard for me. I had to train myself  (talk to myself) to not have a ‘reaction’ to a silly number, but I faced those up days with the attitude to just keep eating smart!

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Sure enough, the numbers would drop a bit again, then maybe a day when it was up a bit, then down some more…. I was interested in the graph, it showed me that weight loss is not a smooth slide downward, it had ups and downs, some spikes, and some drops…but over the long haul there was weight loss. Just having a visual of the graph helped me to understand how the body loses weight, and that there are multiple factors that affect whether you are up or down…. hormones, exercise, sodium intake, humid weather… all kinds of things, not just food intake. I read that a body can gain as much as 10 lbs overnight given the certain reasons. Wow!  I am slowly releasing the scales-madness.  The scales is just a tool I use.

I’m at a good place now after all these years.  I still wish I weighed a less but I don’t stress about it anymore. If I maintain my good eating habits I figure my body will stop losing when it gets to where it’s supposed to be.  It’s not driving me and my emotions like it used to. I actually stress more about whether I’ve eaten enough good green veggies in a day.

I wonder sometimes if I am starting to think like a ‘normal weight healthy’ person who just eats good food so they are not hungry, to enjoy the taste, and stops eating when full.

Hmmm, that would be nice. #goals

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* I was going to talk about some food choices here but decided to put it in the next post. A part of being healthy is getting enough sleep, so…. ‘good night!’

Three Days, and Three Very Long Nights

In my last blog post I explained how I decided to change my habits, eat less, and become healthier. I was so ‘charged’ and excited to jump with both feet into this new way of life.

hungry

DAY ONE:

I had decided to use the My Fitness Pal app to track calories and weight. I used it as my accountability partner. It is an easy-to-use app and has several features to help someone like me monitor  the numbers. I had no desire to use all those features though; and I didn’t really want to join the community groups etc. I just wanted to start changing my life. I set the app at 1,200 per day.  That is sort of low but I only set it that low to start; I’d planned to up it to 1,500 if I made it through three days of detox.

For some reason I felt I had to go through a kind of detox in order to start. There are several detox plans online but I just decide a LOT of water, some with a bit of ACV (Apple Cider Vinegar) or lemon slices, and a few green vegetables and boiled eggs for the first three days.  I wanted to detox my mind and body.

Let me tell you, I thought I was experiencing the dying process by the end of the first day. I was so ‘hone-gree‘ (that’s a few stages past hungry and hangry) that inanimate objects in my house started to look tasty and delicious. I couldn’t believe how my body was screaming out in agony for foods I never even ate anyway: cheeseburgers, fries, nachos, fried apple pies.  I was having visions of food dancing through my head, and I was wide-awake.  I made it though, barely I felt.

I was thankful for bedtime because I thought being asleep would take my mind off my stomach.  WRONG! (* said in my best Trump voice).  I don’t think I slept at all!  I was so hungry I couldn’t fall asleep for a long while.  I must have dozed off eventually because around 2am I woke up with hunger pangs like I was being held as a hostage or something. I tried getting up and drinking water but I soon learned that filling the ravenous cavern in my body with fluid only  meant running to the restroom all night. ‘No bueno’.  Morning was welcomed with open arms and a tired body.

DAY TWO:
No lie, it was hard too.  OK, easier than Day One, but still hard. I was hone-gree. I was working at my company’s office location that day, sitting in my cube and thinking about lunch, which was more veggies, water, boiled egg, water, water, water; but when lunch time came that egg tasted like the best piece of grilled salmon, or steak, or hot dog, or whatever, it was just good! … and I actually made it to dinner time (more veggies, water, veggies and water) without too much agony. I even fell asleep right away that night, but sure enough around 2am I sprung awake as hungry as could be. So much so that I couldn’t fall back asleep.  I hated that, but I endured. I had my first realization: ‘I might be a food addict’.   Couldn’t have my fix and it was affecting my life…. just like an addict.

cukes and peppers

 

DAY THREE:
This day posed a new challenge. I was at a friend’s house and she was making breakfast and I had decided I was going to try to eat breakfast a bit later than what was my usual time.  I was still in the fasting/detox mode but she didn’t know it, and was trying to relearn how and when my body wanted to take in meals. I didn’t want to eat because it was morning, noon or evening.  I was trying to learn to ‘listen’ to my body and understand what authentic ‘hunger’ felt like, not just eating for the sake of eating.  I seriously couldn’t tell the difference between hunger and thirst sometimes.  I just ate for every twang that hit my gut.

So this particular morning, I was offered breakfast and declined.  That didn’t go over so well, and my little friend got on me about how not eating isn’t good for me but I didn’t take the time to explain the process I had just started because all of my mental energy was spent at the point. I just needed to focus on getting through the third day. I didn’t tell anyone about this process I’d begun because I felt it would be too much for me to explain, and I didn’t need or want any monitors initially.  In my mind, if I could get though three days of a sort of detox cleanse then I would be good to go!  It sort of helped to slow, then brake, and break the fast-moving train that was moving in the wrong direction.

I made it through Day Three!  … and lived to tell about it.  I was so happy! I knew I could do this now.  I still woke up that night though…. very hungry. Matter of fact, for the next two weeks, I woke up every night around 2am from hunger. Crazy huh?  Then gradually over the following days after that, it subsided, then stopped.  I never wake up in the night hungry now.

Weight? … Wait!
I once read somewhere about people who had lost significant amounts of weight and their challenge in keeping it off.  One of these people was a physician who has lost lots of weight too.  The one thing they all had in common was that they weighed themselves daily, even after years of keeping the weight off.  I thought once you had the weight off, the challenge would be more the food not the scales.

body scales (2)

I decided to weigh myself daily too.  Now, I see how it is beneficial.  When I was on my way up the scales, I played a lot of ‘weight mind-games’.  I made a lot of assumptions about how much I weigh, based on clothes that had stretched out, etc. Mind games … that’s why I said in the first blog that it’s really a change in your mind/thinking.

If you weigh daily, there is no lying to yourself. The numbers are right there.  For me, it really wasn’t about what the numbers said, it was more about my learning how the numbers on the scales and my emotions/attitude about myself and even life were intimately intertwined… a definite revelation right there.

In my next blog I will talk about the dance with the scales, the mind games I played with myself and I’ll start to share  some of the foods I started to incorporate into my days.

Thanks for reading!  Hope you come back!